shall we not

Friday, April 21, 2006

Why won’t you give me your love?

Here endth my blogging career. I’ve found myself feeling that doing my blog is a bit pointless in the sense I don’t think it’s where I am anymore. I don’t have the problem of saying and explaining how I am feeling to people to the same extent and I don’t need the time and space to compose my thoughts to let the internet be my Switzerland. Those thoughts still remain but they are either left to be or spoken about not written down in no man’s land. Also, I think thematically this has served it’s purpose of showing how I respond to most situations, what I fear, what I love, what makes me upset, what I find difficult and so on to the extent that the highs and lows feel a little like a parody. That explains the why there has been a general decline in the type of posts I put up. Sure I still get plagued by sadness and a feeling of being isolated but there are only so many times you can write about that and not wallow in it and being an emotional chameleon/sponge/mirror I think it can be my own worst enemy in doing so too frequently. However, posting has helped me see what triggers those feelings and stuff like why I like simple tasks (cooking, washing up) which I can control instead of the rest of the time of being in chaos. Hopefully, I’m learning to live without answers.

I think it is also clear what sort of music, tv and films are likely to get me excited so it seems a bit of a pain to do because I know what these are and to put my opinions on that stuff on the internet just seemed a bit self indulgent and pointless.

So there you go and remember; life is just like high school but with more money, isn’t it?

2 Comments:

  • thanks for all the posts. I've really enjoyed reading them.

    By Blogger Unknown, at 10:00 AM  

  • Hugh - you put this very well. I think a lot of other bloggers should be as brave (or sensible) and give up too.
    Far too much drivel out there, and self-indulgence.

    You are wise to see that once you have realised stuff about yourself, there is no point in repeating it!

    By Blogger Nick, at 11:01 AM  

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