but it's ok to kill builders, right?

HaaaaaaaaaaaaaHaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaHaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

(I'm moving and have come to realise just how much stuff i have amassed, i think the Munro Clan Moving Service is in for much lifting particularly as i'm moving from an attic to another attic. Also, had a look at my diary and May is already looking a tad daunting, why did get a diary in the first place? Well because i kept on missing meetings at university so they gave me one)

you nine sided whore

life is a lot easier if you aren't stressed.

gosh what a frightful bore

Just realised that i've changed my amazon and play account details to an address that doesn't exist! I put my house number as 79 instead of 49 so had to frantically change a few orders. Unfortunately one has gone through so is shipping from the US to a house that doesn't exist (i'm at the top of a cul-de-sac). The postcode was right though so hopefully it might find it's way to me if the postman is on the ball. It is a little disconcerting though that i was able to use incorrect information in buying stuff on my credit card on the internet.

Note to self, don't order stuff whilst soemone is talking to you and a remember the truism- moving is a pain in the arse.

those three blokes

Note to self;
- stop crying at church and not knowing why, it leaves you rather miffed.
- don't sit with people you know, it makes you frightfully self conscious.
- try and avoid staring at attractive women.

technological proficiency

As i move into the final week at the Cliffords', one thing i certainly will not miss is the washing machine which has shrunk at least three of my jumpers in a relatively short period of time. It can be quite amusing to try and put them on anyway though.

SERIOUS

Also, feeling a bit floaty in terms of church stuff, now i don't mind a journey to somewhere unknown but at the moment it seems just like i'm just static which i think leads to not helpfulness (i had typed death but that seemed a bit melodramatic). Sorry i can't think of a way to carry on the journey metaphor without plummiting down to using maps and so on.

a little stupidity goes a long way

Had loads of interviews this week and it made me kind of glad that i'm so young in the sense everyone who i've spoken to has assumed my age means i'm a little slow and unable to understand the complexity of the public policy world (which to be fair is true) but it means that they're very revealing. Also, it has shown how much i need a dictaphone given my interview style (ramble on at me whilst i frantically scribble it down) and that first impressions are crucial. For example, today the first thing someone said was they noticed i had a make poverty history band on which was a good start for the interview. I also have to play up my Sheffield roots/credentials a bit!

Also, i've fallen in love with the Magic Numbers, you can watch their video on (www.nme.com/features/) they seem to do the 60's upbeat melody but with slightly less happy lyrics thing (see Beach Boys) very well. They're very much the band du jour in magazines but that appears to be because they're good.

42 boxes of books

Somewhat unbelievably for my profession i am unable to vote at the next election because i was in between houses and am therefore not registered. Also, found out the electoral boundaries have changed so Hallam is now split between Fulwood, Stannington and Broomhill

joy of joys

From the 1st of May i shall be residing on Victor Street in Hillsborough (by the barracks) in a lovely attic room. That is all.

another day over and done

Had a group supervision today which was better than expected, the cademics were nice and constructive but you do feel somewhat educationally sub-normal and knowledge deficient because they're such wise guys (alas no women). Exhausted from a week of really thinking about / doing work so weekend'll be spent totally burned out to the point that activities which should relax will proably irritate.

Current thoughts on house- Nottingham (with Em) is so hot right now but would feel like i'd wasted the work i've done in Sheffield (i've really tried to be different)

Death Cab for Cutie's Transatlantacism is very American but awesome which is getting a scary number of plays by me and each time a different track stands out- lovely stuff. Favourite line (at the moment)- "I wish the world was flat like the old days and then i could travel just by folding the map".

In teacher training today realised it was wierd to have your entire week mapped out including fun stuff. Everyone else just watched tv like i've spent the majority of my 23 years doing and may return to doing depending on the move et al.

guilty pleasures

Had my hair cut this morning and realised that it is one of my favourite things to relax. You sit in a chair for an hour and someone washes your hair, gives you a hair rub and chat away with the hairdresser- I now know all about the SAS and army (the guy's family have been in the army for 280 years) and that in order to be a hairdresser there are 12 haircuts you need to be able to do (only two of those are male haircuts- long and short). Anyway realised that i've just done a post about my hair, i truly am too gay to function!

something you don't see very often

A funny thing happened at church on Sunday and that was after someone having a word that the eyes of my heart would be opened i noticed that a lot of people seemed to be being very nice to me. Loads of people i don't know very well wished me a happy birthday and then Andy and Bea cooked me the most awesome feast last night. Go team people!

speak slow

coincidence-A sequence of events that although accidental seems to have been planned or arranged

happenstance-A circumstance especially that is due to chance

chance- An accidental or unpredictable event

serendipity- A happy accident

Is there a word for when these things happen that doesn't involve it being an accident?

yous is my favourite

Got to thinking about favourites today since i was strutting around to the new Beck album which is back in the Odelay style as opposed to the lower key Sea Change era. Anyway, i love Beck and he always makes any list of my favourite artists but i realised that i don't actually listen to him very much, nor Beastie Boys, Pixies etc... who are normally in the list. Does this mean that i still feel their influence strongly or has my taste developed and i don't need them anymore, or does number of plays equal importance? It's the same with films too, i've not seen Memento in ages, i'd forgotten about Rear Window until i happened to see it on ITV the other night. Maybe the memory of favourites is better than watching them over and over. In terms of plays, my favourite film would be dazed and confused since i can do all the dialogue (i did so this afternoon- i needed cheering up) but it's hardly a masterpiece of cinema...

models of democracy

my birthday resolution- to stop biting my nails

so this is Christmas

My parents have finally sold their house- hooray!

It does mean that i'll be homeless from the end of May though

you've got ten seconds to make me fall in love with you

Realised that yet again my posts have become a somewhat sombre tone of late but then that's what i've felt like recently so there.

At brunch yesterday Lol was talking about enneagrams (if you do a google search on it there are sites that offer free tests) which i remembered that my Mum had lent me a book on and so i went and took the test. Enneagrams put people into 9 personality groups based on a number of criteria. I came out to my dismay as an individualist (closely followed by an investigator which is the group i think most people who know me would put me in, me seeming fairly bookish and doing a PHd and all and was the one i think i was in when i did the test last time) who are: The Sensitive, Withdrawn Type: Expressive, Dramatic, Self-Absorbed, and Temperamental

So that means that when healthy i can be; Self-aware, introspective, on the "search for self," aware of feelings and inner impulses. Sensitive and intuitive both to self and others: gentle, tactful, compassionate. / Highly personal, individualistic, "true to self." Self-revealing, emotionally honest, humane. Ironic view of self and life: can be serious and funny, vulnerable and emotionally strong.

However, when unhealthy i can be; When dreams fail, become self-inhibiting and angry at self, depressed and alAvoid lengthy conversations in your imagination, particularly if they are negative, resentful, or even excessively romantic. alienated from self and others, blocked and emotionally paralyzed. Ashamed of self, fatigued and unable to function. / Tormented by delusional self-contempt, self-reproaches, self-hatred, and morbid thoughts: everything is a source of torment. Blaming others, they drive away anyone who tries to help them. / Despairing, feel hopeless and become self-destructive, possibly abusing alcohol or drugs to escape. In the extreme: emotional breakdown or suicide is likely. Generally corresponds to the Avoidant, Depressive, and Narcissistic personality disorders.

I didn't really know how to respond to this since i hold little value in this sort of thing (Myers Briggs etc-INFJ) but this did seem to be fairly accurate and it seems to suggest that how i perceive myself isn't fully accurate. In response, advice for individualists is:
- Do not pay so much attention to your feelings
- Avoid putting off things until you are "in the right mood"
- Self-esteem and self-confidence will develop only from having positive experiences, whether or not you believe that you are ready to have them
- A wholesome self-discipline takes many forms, from sleeping regular hours to working regularly to exercising regularly, and has a cumulative, strengthening effect
- Avoid lengthy conversations in your imagination, particularly if they are negative, resentful, or even excessively romantic

So a lot to think about there, maybe i'll get a book about it. Which reminds me i got a book on God and the Disney films by Mark Pinsky who wrote a cool book called the Gospel according to the Simpsons.

Something else to ponder: are coincidences by their very being random or is there no such thing? I'm increasingly thinking that there is no such thing as a random coincidence

cathedrals of despair (service stations)

Went on a road trip to Leeds via Birmingham the other day (although not technically a road trip as i went by train) which made me realise that i need to do more things like it. It was so nice just to idly sit on a train and stare out of the window plus i bought a load of stuff- clothes mainly as i continue my attempts to become Seth Cohen but also the phenomenal Death Cab for Cutie album which i listen to at least 3 times a day. Now might need to be a little fruggle but having said that my plan for the day is to go and watch 5x2 at the UGC so not that money conscious then. Not really looking forward to my birthday next week (i always have issues with it) and am interviewing a councillor which should be cool (no really, i'm looking forward to that).